Hello Dear Author!!

I'm so excited that you're writing for me! I am very easy to please - so have fun with the prompts if they inspire you in any particular way. All details and suggestions are optional!

• Underage under 16
• Villanizing female characters/canon romantic interests
• Incest
• Graphic non-con or sexual abuse of female characters (references are fine)
• Femsub
• Cheating
• On-again, off-again relationships
• Sexism/racism/homophobia/transphobia etc., if references are necessary to the plot that's fine, but I prefer the story didn't revolve around it
• Graphic birth
• Kidfic where characters parent OC kid (characters turned into kids are ok)
• Beastiality/monsterfucking (with non-human monsters)
• Whump/Gore/Torture porn/permanent consensual body modification (moderate violence/horror okay for plot)
• MCD or hopeless endings

• Villanizing female characters/canon romantic interests
• Incest
• Graphic non-con or sexual abuse of female characters (references are fine)
• Femsub
• Cheating
• On-again, off-again " relationships
• Sexism/racism/homophobia/transphobia etc., if references are necessary to the plot that's fine, but I prefer the story didn't revolve around it
• Mpreg/pregnancy
• Kidfic where characters parent OC kid (characters turned into kids are ok)
• Beastiality/monsterfucking (with non-human monsters)
• Whump/Gore/Torture porn/permanent consensual body modification (moderate violence/horror okay for plot)
• MCD or hopeless endings

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Fandom 1: The Witcher (TV)

Ship: Eskel/Jaskier/Geralt

• PWP a-okay here! Eskel and Geralt wrecking Jaskier is always my fave, but changing it up with Eskel or Geralt as the receiver of attention would be magnifique
• Eskel/Geralt as either old friends (with benefits?) or lovers of long standing who have always been devoted to each other. Jaskier feeling awkward/unsure of breaking into this dynamic, but too damn in love with them both to give it up.
• Established Geralt/Jaskier where Jaskier knows that Geralt has been pining after Eskel and decides to make it happen.
• Post-mountain Jaskier taking up with Eskel and it's so easy. But then Geralt gets jealous ....
• Playing into Eskel and Geralt's wolfish mutagens for sweet, smutty or angsty results
• Eskel's self-hatred about his scars, Geralt's self-hatred about ... a lot of things

Fandom 2: Original Work

Ship: Prince/Princess/Commoner who volunteered to be their mutual concubine as a wedding gift (OW)

• I saw this scenario as an arranged marriage between the prince/princess, who might have never seen each other before their wedding night and one/both are inexperienced and virginal. The commoner (prefer male) might be someone who is known to one or both of them (a servant? a trusted companion? a forbidden love?) who helps guides their consummation
• Angst welcome! But hopefully everyone has a rocking good time and there's a hopeful ending

Ship: Male Omega King/His Harem of Male Alphas (OW), Male Alpha King/His Harem of Male Omegas (OW)

• Alliances/forbidden love/bitter rivalries between the harem members
• Does the king have a favorite/favorites? How does he express this? Is it truly love on all parts?
• World-building and exploration of hierarchy and oppression (whichever way you decide the oppression runs)
• How pregnancy/child-rearing is handled. Does it raise the harem member in prestige?
• Also love me a found-family harem who all adore the king and rally around to protect him/advise him

Ship: Kind Sickly King/His Protective Best Male Friend/The King's New Male Betrothed (OW), Irritable But Competent Lord/Affable Male Captain of His Guard/Lord's New Male Betrothed (OW)

• Pining + forbidden love + protective/loyalty-based relationship + falling in love in an arranged marriage
• Complicated feelings all around!! Jealousy and misunderstandings!
• A slow-burn feelings-focused fic would be A+++ here ... emotional anguish and a happy ending?

Ship: Warlord/His Sorcerer Lover/Conquered Prince (OW)

• AOK with some hard dub-con here, but I'd prefer the prince to enjoy himself at least a little bit (even though he might hate himself after)
• The prince being wily and attempting seduction as a way to cause a rift between the couple (and quickly realizing he's in over his head)
• Sex magic
• Could go with a dark-ish ending with the prince ending up their pet, or a more hopeful ending with a benevolent warlord/sorcerer

Ship: Pirate Crew/Prince Who Paid Them To Kidnap Him (OW)

• Non/dub/fully con all AOK! Did the prince not have the money he promised? Or did he just want to have some fun before his "rescue"? 

Ship: Nymph/Pack of Werewolves (OW)

• Preference for male nymph
• Would like the werewolves to be of human-ish intelligence and not "full wolf"/beastiality
• Non/dub/fully con all AOK - a hunt through the woods + a ravishing? Is the nymph the leader of the pack and they are all protective of and adore him? A ritual sacrifice/trade of power? 
• Bonus points for a particularly innocent nymph

Ship: Elf Prince/His Male Orc Lover/King Brother They Overthrew (OW)

• Leaning towards a non/dub-con direction, but feel free to surprise me!
• Incest in on my DNW, but in this particular case it's just a squick if the brothers have sex with each other. Elf prince can direct his Orc lover in the ravishment/humiliation/etc. 

Ship: Male Alpha/Male Beta/Male Omega (OW)

• I'd love some world-building in this! Is alpha/beta/omega the most "standard" relationship pattern? Is there a hierarchical structure in this society/systems of oppression?
• Alpha/Beta are the "main couple" and Omegas are used as surrogates/pets?
• Alpha/Omega are the "main couple" and the Beta helps with child-rearing/household management?
• Rock-paper-scissors situation where Alphas lead the family, Betas care for Omegas and Omegas can control/pacify Alphas with pheromones
• Any subversion of said tropes!

Fandom 3: Dragon Age

Ship: Alistair/Zevran/Female Warden

Optional (but loved) if you use my female Tabris here

• Established Zevran/Warden: Zevran and Warden have a fiercely close bond. Alistair pines from afar until they take him in and throughly debauch him (bonus if it's his first time). Very two cats + a dog dynamic, he's just happy to be here ;;
• Established Alistair/Warden: Alistair and Warden invite Zevran for a sexual encounter (more likely, agrees to one of his half-serious propositions, to his surprise). Zevran is smitten to experience the relaxed, fun dynamic between the two and is surprised when they both decide to focus on him, as he is usually the one doing the servicing (very very bonus for Alistair fucking Zevran while Warden rides him). Afterwards, Zevran thinks that it's just a one-time thing and steels himself for never feeling such love again ... but then they reassure him that they want him for good.
• Established Alistair/Zevran/Warden (AU?): Alistair receives a visit from his Royal Assassins (and/or Royal Courtesans). Some power play where Zevran and Warden play-act that he is their king/can order them to do his bidding, but really the power is in their hands.
• Love triangle: Warden is really annoyed with Alistair and Zevran sniping at each other, acting jealous and not-so-subtly trying to get into her pants, so she agrees to sleep with both of them at the same time and date whoever can make her come first. Would prefer a humorous, light-hearted take on this rather than angsty haha, and Alistair/Zevran/Warden endgame, of course. 

Hello dear author!

Thank you for writing for me! Below is a list of my general interests (fandom-specific prompts will be left on AO3)! 

Dear Author,

To be honest, for most exchanges I just kind of copy/paste from my previous letters, but this is definitely a different beast. 

What I like to see from world-building:

• From the perspective of one or multiple characters - I prefer experiencing history through its interactions with character agency, emotion and experiences. That's fine if it necessarily limits the perspective, I just prefer a focal point to see the world through.
• Myths/folklore/rumors mixing with fact - along with the above, it's rare that a single character (barring, say, a historian) will know the accurate facts about everything around them. I like a bit of ambiguity, characters filling in the gaps in their knowledge with rumor, speculation and imagination. Especially when you get differing accounts of the same thing, characters with overlapping knowledge or conflicting views.
• Moral ambiguity - nothing entirely being good or evil, though I'd like to see colored judgement from different perspectives.
• Rebels and corruptors - not everyone follows the rules, not everyone accepts the truth as fact. Tell me about the factions that push back against societal norms, and the consequences they face.
• Plot & shipping - not required, and definitely up to your judgement. Happy with a day in the life type fics for most of these requests, but also happy with worldbuilding folded cleverly around a story of some kind.

A note on requested characters: Please don't feel limited to writing only the requested characters!! I added them to this letter for reference, but as you can see my optional ships section includes other characters. I only requested characters if I wish at least one of them to be included, so they are my absolute favorites :)

The Witcher (TV)

Characters: Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia (The Witcher (TV)), Jaskier | Dandelion (The Witcher (TV)), Original Character(s) (The Witcher (TV)), Renfri | The Shrike (The Witcher (TV)), Triss Merigold (The Witcher (TV))

Optional ships: Geralt/Jaskier, Jaskier & Renfri, Yennefer/Renfri, Geralt & Wolf Witchers, Eskel/Triss

Interactions between different Witcher schools:

• How do Wolf Witchers feel about Cats? Manicores? Vipers?
• What happens when two Witchers from different schools take the same job?
• Do Witchers have a common bestiary, or does each school make their own? How do they handle the confusion when there is conflicting information on how to handle a monster? Do they have different names for the same monster?
• What is each school's "stereotype" and how is it slagged on by other Witchers? Are Wolves holier-than-thou glory hounds? Are Cats kill-stealing drunkards? Are Manticores ... still existing?
• Gwent tourneys for the glory of the School!

Private customs and inside jokes among Witchers:

• I'm thinking across all schools, but feel free to interject differences between schools/focus on Wolf Witchers. 
• Secret greetings, inside jokes
• Symbols carved on trails, outside inn posts etc. warning other Witchers: friendly folk here/no work, turn away/cheats & liars - beware!! (aka hobo hieroglyphs) 
• Was "Toss a Coin" a game-changer for Witchers? Have there been songs composed in their honor before? What do they think of this "Geralt of Rivia" who suddenly is the most famous Witcher of them all? Do the other Witchers now seek bards of their own/seek Jaskier in particular? 

School of the Cat:

• What cat-like characteristics do these Witchers possess?
• Cat Witchers are the only ones who allow women. Why? How does this gender dynamic change their training, if at all? Do female Witchers face special discrimination? Do the mutagens affect them differently than men? Would ADORE Witcher!Renfri or Witcher!Yennefer if you want to make an AU happen but OCs also loved!
• Aiden's history
• Caravan life! How do their base of operations work?
• Cats kill humans as well as monsters. Consequences for this? How does this impact their reputation? Does it gain them political favor? At what cost?

Hades (Video Game 2018)

Characters: Cerberus, Nyx, Hypnos, Thanatos

Optional ships: Zagreus/Thanatos, Zagreus/Dionysus, Zagreus/Hypnos, Zagreus/Achilles, Persephone/Nyx are my favorites, but honestly I ship everyone/everyone in this game so go wild

Chthonic gods prior to the arrival of Hades

• Organization (if any) of the underworld prior to Hades, how shades were taken care of, were they just allowed to wander wherever? Did the different levels exist, and if not, who built them?
• Zagreus mentioned that Asphodel didn't always used to be a lava field. When did it change and why? What was it like way back when?
• Nyx POV, ruminating on her relationship with Chaos and her sons
• Ramifications of sealing the Titans in the underworld

Life in the Court of Hades

• Thanatos, Hypnos and Charon upbringing ... who handled their duties prior to their birth? How did they learn their roles? I do love childhood friends Thanatos/Zagreus, perhaps interacting with young Meg and Hypnos? 
• Any fun greek myths through the eyes of the Chthonic gods/underworld denizens (what Sisyphus did to earn eternal punishment, for example ... does Thanatos still get teased for it?)
• What is the local economy like? What do shades even DO with the gems they (presumably) get paid with? Is there black market trading for items like nectar or other things that invoke memories of life? 
• Work in the administrative chambers seems endless, and down-time seems scarce. Do the underworld denizens have hobbies? Holidays? Minor-league sports teams?
• Cerberus POV/background/day-in-the-life because he is the Best Boy

• Focus on rape/forced pregnancy/graphic sexual violence (particularly with regards to female characters)
• Focus on Hades, Zeus, Poseidon or Theseus (just not my favorite characters)
• Shipping Artemis with male characters
• Torture porn
• Villanizing female characters/canon romantic interests
• Incest
• Sexism/racism/homophobia/transphobia etc., if references are necessary to the plot that's fine, but I prefer the story didn't revolve around it (fantasy oppression is AOK to explore!!)
• Any sexual activity with characters under 18, or ANY adult/child relationships
• Mpreg/pregnancy
• Beastiality/monsterfucking (with non-humanoid monsters)
• Scat/vore/piss fetish
• Dominant male characters/submissive female characters

Dragon Age 

Characters: Zevran Arainai

Optional ships: Zevran/Alistair, Zevran/female Tabris (here for my OC, but that's super duper optional), Zevran/others

Antivan Crows:

• Initiation rites/exploring Zevran's rather interesting dream in the Broken Circle quest
• Schooling of new assassins
• Internal structure and politics
• Reputation/influence on the rest of Antiva ... Zevran mentioned that a successful Crow had many doors opened to them (luxury goods, lovers etc.). What does that mean in the day-to-day? What can they take and what can they keep? 
• Can a Crow ever truly retire?
• Intersection of elf oppression/Crow status ... it seems that they take both human and elf orphans. Are they treated the same? Is Antiva relatively progressive, or just as bad, if not worse than Ferelden in terms of discrimination?

• Focus on rape/forced pregnancy/graphic sexual violence (particularly with regards to female characters)
• I feel bad putting this as a DNW, but I've really only played Origins ... if possible, no spoilers for the expansions/other games? 
• Villanizing female characters/canon romantic interests
• Incest
• Sexism/racism/homophobia/transphobia etc., if references are necessary to the plot that's fine, but I prefer the story didn't revolve around it (fantasy oppression is AOK to explore!!)
• Any sexual activity with characters under 18, or ANY adult/child relationships
• Mpreg/pregnancy
• Beastiality/monsterfucking (with non-humanoid monsters)
• Scat/vore/piss fetish
• Dominant male characters/submissive female characters

Notes on original work categories: 

This section I'd like to leave a little open-ended! The following prompts simply suggest characters that I would find interesting send them through the world. For original work ships (should you choose to write them), I have no preference between slash, het, femmeslash etc. as I adore them all equally!

ALL original work categories may be written as AUs with the Witcher 'verse characters/concept. I would in fact ADORE this!!


Original Work - Eldritch Fantasy

Original Work - Space Western

• A sheltered academic (either fresh out of finishing school or a spinster) who suddenly finds themselves penniless and decides to seek their fortunes off-world
• A gruff bounty hunter with a heart of gold who suddenly finds themselves escorting a naivee mail-order spouse through the most dangerous part of space
• The madam of a brothel on a popular trading planet, famed for its exotic alien sex workers
• A person on earth who decides to escape their dark past (sex work? wanted for crimes? an insurrectionist?) by signing on for an ad to become a mail-order spouse

• I don't know how to phrase this as a DNW but even though I'm fine with exploring discrimination against sex work in-universe, I would not like the tone of the fic to be condemning, discriminatory or patronizing about sex work in general
• Explicit rape/forced pregnancy/graphic sexual violence (particularly with regards to female characters)
• Incest
• Sexism/racism/homophobia/transphobia etc., this is a "soft" DNW depending on the context ... I would just ask the fic tread thoughtfully in this area. 
• Any sexual activity with characters under 18, or ANY adult/child relationships
• Smut with non-humanoid aliens (references are fine!)
• Mpreg/pregnancy
• Scat/vore/piss fetish
• Hopeless grimdark ending
• Dominant male characters/submissive female characters

Original Work - Urban Fantasy

• A person in desperate need of a pregnancy test in the middle of the night trying to navigate the conversation with the cashier at the Fae-run corner store in a way that doesn't inadvertently give up their first-born child
• A talking street cat who knows that they are be-spelled but is not sure what their original form was, going on a quest to get the curse lifted
• A near-sighted old lady who goes to the park every day to feed breadcrumbs to pigeons discovers that she has inadvertently been making offerings to some more fantastical vermin
• A day in the life of a non-human navigating a human city and its accommodations/lack thereof for fantasy races (or visa versa!) 

• Explicit rape/forced pregnancy/graphic sexual violence (particularly with regards to female characters)
• Incest
• Sexism/racism/homophobia/transphobia etc., references are fine, exploration of fantasy oppression absolutely encouraged
• Any sexual activity with characters under 18, or ANY adult/child relationships
• Smut with non-humanoid fantasy creatures (references are fine!)
• Mpreg/pregnancy
• Scat/vore/piss fetish
• Hopeless grimdark ending
• Dominant male characters/submissive female characters

Original Work - Fantasy

• A Trickster God who seeds the world with wish-granting items that twist the wishes of their users
• New apprentice to a magical artisan guild who realizes that the crafts they are making gain their properties by trapping sentient Fae inside
• A beleaguered Fae who can only talk in riddles trying to confess their love to a human
• A harpy interacting with a human/elf mage, extremely perplexed at their entirely alien structure of magic
• A merperson from an imperialistic caste-based society interacting with an elf from a tribalistic community-based society

• Explicit rape/forced pregnancy/graphic sexual violence (particularly with regards to female characters)
• Incest
• Sexism/racism/homophobia/transphobia etc., references are fine, exploration of fantasy oppression absolutely encouraged
• Any sexual activity with characters under 18, or ANY adult/child relationships
• Smut with non-humanoid fantasy creatures (references are fine!)
• Mpreg/pregnancy
• Scat/vore/piss fetish
• Hopeless grimdark ending
• Dominant male characters/submissive female characters

 Dear Author,

Thank you so much for writing for me! This is my first year participating in Holiday Horror, and I hope it will be a fun experience for the both of us! I'm really a very easy recipient. I love horror in almost all of its iterations, and I am equally open to receiving non-horror fic as well!

General likes & dislikes

• Psychological horror (that stays away from mental health stereotypes)
• Sci-fi body horror (a la Annihilation, the Thing)
• Slow burn, atmospheric 
• Final girls, general badass women in horror
• Gothic horror
• Young girls becoming witches as a coming-of-age metaphor
• Period pieces
• Horror anthologies with connected stories (everyone buys a cursed item from the same shop, a group of people each have to confront their individual worst fear) 
• Horror from mythology (particularly Asian mythology)

• Fake relationship
• Arranged marriage/marriage of convenience
• Kitten!fic (either one or multiple characters being turned into kittens, or always being cats)
• Found family
• World-building
• Not being able to forget a one night stand/brief fling/almost relationship and reconnecting several years down the road
• "Just one night" scenarios (before going off to war or an execution, pre-agreement not to meet again etc.)
• Experience gap (very experienced partner/inexperienced partner), sex and relationship-wise
• A/B/O and D/s universe
• Comedic misunderstandings
• Crack and humor
• One character is inexperienced with sex/dating and the other character offers to be their guide (basically "practice dating/sex") but it turns to love
• Casual sex/FWB turns to love
• Creative AUs (space cowboys!! urban fantasy!!) 
• Mutual pining

• Torture porn
• Villanizing female characters/canon romantic interests
• Incest
• Graphic non-con or sexual abuse (references are fine)
• Cheating
• Open relationships
• On-again, off-again relationships
• Sexism/racism/homophobia/transphobia etc., if references are necessary to the plot (i.e. The Alienist) that's fine, but I prefer the story didn't revolve around it
• Any sexual activity with characters under 18, or ANY adult/child relationships
• Mpreg/pregnancy
• Kidfic where characters parent OC kid (characters turned into kids are ok)
• Relationships with massive power imbalance (teacher/student, boss/employee, age gaps etc.)
• Beastiality/monsterfucking (with non-human monsters)
• Scat/vore/piss fetish

Fandom 1: Buzzfeed Unsolved Series

I ship Shane/Ryan, but I also love their frienemy banter, so Shane & Ryan is aok! For this fandom, I would prefer a more humorous take on the horror aspects, in line with the show. 

• Shane is a ghost living in Ryan's home
• Shane and Ryan in the 19th/early 20th century. Shane exposes false mediums/hucksters a la Houdini. Ryan is a true believer, trying to convince his friend of the validity of the other side. 
• Shane is cursed/possessed during a visit, and Ryan has to save him. 

Fandom 2: Castlevania

Big on the Alucard/Trevor bandwagon. I didn't include Syph in the ask, but I love her too! 

• Any smut of the Alucard/Trevor variety
• Enemies to reluctant allies to friends shenanigans, all the pining and conflicted feelings that come with that
• Alucard/Trevor sleeping together and not talking about it bc both are emotionally repressed af
• Syph POV of their relationship, generally being tired of the UST 
• Casefic! Trevor using his knowledge to defeat cool monsters/demons. 
• Holiday casefic

 
Fandom 3: Original fiction

I feel like these tags are prompts onto themselves! 

• Final Girl (Original Work)
• Owner of a Sinister Curio Shop (Original Work)
• group: characters living in reneissance italy setting & unknown killer
• wild west bounty hunter entering ghost town
• Group: Female Vampires/Naive Female Vampire Hunter
• Group: Forgotten God & Unwary Hiker Who Stumbled Upon the Ruins of Their Temple
• Group: Human Stolen by the Fairies & Their Changeling Replacement
• Group: Late Night Veterinarian/Werewolf
• Group: Character Come to Life & The Author Who Wrote Them (Original Work)
• Boy cursed into the body of a cat
• Female thrall of vampire
• Cursed toy and the child who receives it as a gift
• Original Youkai Character(s) 

Fandom 4: The Witcher (TV)

I only requested Renfri and Geralt/Jaskier, but I would also take Triss/Yennefer, Renfri/Yennefer, Renfri & Jaskier. Please also add any other characters you like/Eskel, Lambert and Vesemir as well! 

• Winter casefic with a twist
• Jaskier learns list of his future sexual partners and Geralt's name is last. Would be interesting if this happened before Jaskier ever met Geralt and only knew of his reputation, so he's convinced that Geralt is going to murder him or something.
• Jaskier has been inadvertently courting Geralt with obscure Witcher courting rituals
• AU where Jaskier gets into debt, and has to seduce Geralt to get out of it (is Geralt the mob money collector? Or does someone want secrets out of the Witcher/to lull him into a false sense of security before an assassination??) 
• Triss and Yennefer period romance
• Warlord AU where Renfri succeeded in bringing Lillit's wrath onto the world, and Yennefer is at her side every step of the way
• Renfri and Jaskier as siblings in a Demon Slayer AU (Renfri is turned into a mindless/hungry demon who is curbed from eating human flesh out of her love for her brother, Jaskier has to figure out how to save her) 
• Scooby Doo modern AU with Geralt, Jaskier, Yennefer + whoever else

Dear Author,

First of all, I'm so excited to have been paired with you for this exchange! Thank you so much in advance for the story you're going to write me, and I'm sure that I'm going to absolutely love it! Sorry, by the way, that this letter was completed so late. I had personal issues/RL/yada yada yada.

Anyways, the list of my general likes/dislikes/squicks can be found here. I'd be happy to see these kinks/plot devices as applied to any pairing! For Gen options and fandom-specific likes continue below:

( Read more... )

Title: Better Lock It in Your Pocket (or, Ten Secrets about Nikolai Romanov, as kept by Clint Barton)
Fandom: Avengers
Genre: Slash, Crack/Humor, Genderblending, Angst, Character Study
Word Count: ~1400
Pairing(s): male!Natasha/Clint
Rating: PG-13
Warnings/Contents: Alludes to past possible abuse, Clint's POV, no fix-it for Phil :(

Written for: this prompt at avengerkink
Notes: This was supposed to be crack, and then it descended into very aggressive angst(?) BTW, I adore male!Natasha but I'm still working on his characterization. I'm afraid that this is not one of those stories that focus on how being male would particularly change Natasha's experience.
Beta: none

Summary: Clint knows the scary, secret truth: Nikolai is a dork. He just has the world’s best poker face about it. After seven years serving as Nikolai’s BFF and occasional bed warmer (in Soviet Russia, you don’t fuck Nikolai Romanov, Nikolai Romanov fucks you), Clint has gathered a heap of intel which he has been threatened under pain of death multiple times never to disclose.
Disclaimer: No ownership was claimed in the making of this nonsense.



( Nikolai Romanov is a cool-eyed, long-legged beauty who’d kill a man as soon as look at him. )

Title: Five Interventions the Avengers Held For Each other and One They Held For Loki
Fandom: Avengers
Genre: Slash, Crack/Humor, Gen
Word Count: ~2400
Pairing(s): Gen, Tony/Loki
Rating: PG-13
Warnings/Contents: Mild kinkshaming of technophilia at the beginning of the work.

Written for: this prompt atavengers_kink. Also for chelz710, who asked for something cracky for her birthday and loves frostiron
Notes: Arg, I have a big bang and a reverse big bang to work on and I just keep churning out the crack.
Beta: None

Summary: The next time, they had an omelet bar, champagne and a banner without penises on it. Also, Jane Foster was there. Thor seemed delighted when he stepped into the room and everyone toasted him with a jubilant, “Intervention!”
or
The Avengers hold interventions a la How I Met Your Mother
Disclaimer: No ownership was claimed in the making of this nonsense.




(  Thor stood, “Brother, I have a ballad prepared for this occasion. ‘Tis called, Look at thy life, look at thy choices.” )

Title: Five Kinks Tony Stark Does Not Have Anymore Thanks to Steve Rogers  (+1 He Still Likes)
Fandom: Avengers
Genre: Slash, Crack/Humor
Word Count: ~2500
Pairing(s): Steve Rogers/Tony Stark, background Clint/Coulson, Clint+Tony jackass friendship
Rating: R
Warnings/Contents: Bad!sex galore, poorly thought-out sexual decisions

Written for: this prompt at comment_fic
Notes: It seems that I am destined to write nothing but bad crack for this fandom. Clint snuck in and took over this fic like a ninja.
Beta: The lovely-as-always chelz710

Summary: "Hm ..." Clint paused in the bedroom doorway, surveying Tony as he lay in fetal position, sulkily clutching a hot water bottle to his groin. "Can't decide what to mock you for without more information."
Disclaimer: No ownership was claimed in the making of this nonsense.



( Clint was not as amused, and the next day Tony found that his custom-ordered RealDoll had been thoroughly used as target practice. )

Title: Feed a Fever
Fandom: Suits
Genre: H/C, Pre-slash, Fluff
Word Count: ~2000
Pairing: Harvey/Mike, Donna
Rating: PG
Warnings: Sketchy medical knowledge

Written for: shiroi_ten at suits_exchange
Notes: Had this on my hard drive since January, finally getting around to cleaning it up and putting it out there.
Beta: Thank you to phreakycat and random00b!

Summary: The puppy is sick and obviously can’t be trusted to take care of himself.
Disclaimer: No ownership was claimed in the making of this nonsense.



( “I have a temperature of a hundred and two,” Mike said as he opened the door. “I’m most likely delirious and certainly contagious.” )